I really have to thank Michelle, who stepped in to write today’s post at just a couple of days notice.
Michelle is a wife and mom of three. Before marriage and motherhood blessed her life, she served a mission, got a B.S. in Psychology and an MBA (Organizational Behavior emphasis), and worked as a business consultant. She’s been grateful to be a stay-at-home mom since her first child was born. Her hobbies include volunteering on a college advisory board and as managing editor of mormonwoman.org.
“Mom, what is sex?”
I’d always planned on being open with my children about sexuality, but hearing this question from my young son caught me off guard. Somehow in the midst of their neighborhood playtime, a friend had decided to “educate” our children about sex.
I don’t remember how I responded to him that day, but I do remember how my momma heart changed. It turned more earnestly to God as I realized how proactive — even preemptive — I’d have to be in teaching truth about sexuality. I didn’t want my children to learn first from others; I wanted them to learn first at home. And even as I wasn’t afraid of talking about this topic with them, I knew I needed God’s help to know how and what to teach, and when.
He hasn’t let me down.
Since I’m the one at home most often with the children (and I tend to be more comfortable with the topic than my husband), I’ve been the parent to do the most teaching. Teaching moments have often come at unexpected times, for maybe only a minute or two. As I’ve tried to keep my heart and eyes open, the Spirit helps me take advantage of such fleeting opportunities. (They come more often than I would have thought!)
And once in a while, He opens the windows of heaven and provides real anchor moments for us as we learn and talk together.
One of those experiences came the night I had the thought to use The Family: A Proclamation to the Word for scripture study. My husband was out of town. My young children and I gathered in the hallway, of all places, to do our scripture study. I didn’t know what lay in store for us as I started to read:
“We, the First Presidency and the Council of the Twelve Apostles of The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints, solemnly proclaim that marriage between a man and a woman is ordained of God and that the family is central to the Creator’s plan for the eternal destiny of His children.”
I don’t think I’d anticipated at this point that we’d end up talking about the law of chastity, but as I continued to read, the Spirit helped connect simple threads of truth woven throughout the Proclamation in powerful ways. By the time we finished our discussion (one that lasted around an hour), there was an electricity in the air. We felt an excitement about the plan of happiness, and a clear understanding of why the law of chastity is so important to God. As President Boyd K. Packer has taught,
“To be entrusted with the power to create life carries with it the greatest of joys and dangerous temptations. The gift of mortal life and the capacity to kindle other lives is a supernal blessing. Through the righteous exercise of this power, as in nothing else, we may come close to our Father in Heaven and experience a fulness of joy. This power is not an incidental part of the plan of happiness. It is the key—the very key.” (Boyd K. Packer, Cleansing the Inner Vessel, October 2010 General Conference)
I am grateful to live in a time when there are prophets on the earth who teach eternal truths with boldness, love, and clarity. I love being a mother and cherish the opportunity to teach my children these truths. The gospel of Jesus Christ means everything to my husband and me, and we testify of the peace, power, and perspective that comes as we study, teach, and live the principles found in the Proclamation.
Don’t forget to visit The Red Headed Hostess, Welcome to the Madness, and We Talk of Christ today to see what wonderful goodness they have about the Family Proclamation!
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Very inspirational! The Proclamation really is magnificent…Thank you!
I will have to remember this when it comes up with our kids!
Great post!
Wonderful. What a blessing it is to be prompted in the ways to study so we can lead and guide our children. Thank you.
I had never thought about using the Proclamation in this way — thank you for passing this experience on!
It is definitely an attention getting question isn’t it? What a wonderful opportunity to teach our children about chastity and procreation. I am truly grateful for The Family Proclamation and the For the Strength of Youth Booklet that teach such important eternal truths.
I have always liked your blog and now I am glad to LIKE it on Facebook too. Thanks for always being an inspiration to us all.
It’s so good to have a gospel perspective!
freshlycompleted.blogspot.com
Great post. It is amazing when those teaching moments pop up and how amazing it feels when the Spirit prompts you.
I love this! Thank You.
Thank-you for this post! I have not had the talk about sex with my kids but made me realize that I really need to, before they are taught by their friends. This helps me so much!
Thank you for sharing! I Love this celebration and all the wonderful posts I am getting to read! So inspiring!
Thank you for sharing this
Great article. Very helpful for me!! Thanks!
Wow, this was a great read. It really got me thinking. Thanks!
mmmm .. eat chocolate …
Thank you for sharing
Thanks for this post.
I’m finally getting a chance to read all the comments. Thanks to all those who are making this celebration of the Proclamation possible. I’ve wanted to record this experience for a long time, so it was a blessing for me to write this. I really was amazed at how much there is in the Proclamation to really teach the doctrine of the law of chastity — to teach the whys, not just the don’ts. It’s like Pres. Packer has said:
“True doctrine, understood, changes attitudes and behavior. The study of the doctrines of the gospel will improve behavior quicker than a study of behavior will improve behavior.”
This topic scares me to approach with my (now very young) children), but it is so important. What a fantastic idea, though. Thank you for sharing!
Such a great topic and explanation. We (I mean from the Grandparents to the Nursery age) are bombarded with messages of sexuality. It surrounds us in our media, clothing, and lives.
My boys are fascinated with babies and want to hold, love, and learn about them. Hopefully in our future there will be more babies and the topic will be close to all our hearts.
This can be such an emotionally charged topic…I am grateful for your perspective…it helps me to know that our approach, which is similar to yours, will (hopefully) be a blessing to our family. Thanks so much for sharing with us!
Brilliant, this sounds like a much better way of bringing the topic up and teaching it rather than an awkward ‘birds and the bee’s discussion.
Kristin, my children were only about 4, 5, and 6 when the neighborhood friend brought up the topic, so I hear you. Maybe yours are even younger, but the advice I would give is just to be ready. The Spirit will help you. Sometimes questions come really early on and out of the blue, and you usually don’t have to say a lot — most of the time, very simple answers are enough, and then once in a while an experience like this one will come along.
Tracy, time will tell, but so far, I feel like my children are comfortable talking with us and, most importantly, they understand not only the ‘technical’ side of sex (now that they are older…we hadn’t had that discussion when this experience happened), but the doctrinal side. And it’s something we continually reinforce as the Spirit directs…I obviously don’t believe in ‘the talk’ only happening once, but instead having many talks happening throughout their lives.
Thank you so much for the post. I feel this is a very important topic to discuss with your families. I am a foster mother and we have to be careful how we aproach matters on this subject but love knowing I have a document and Heavenly Father to help guide me in approaching this topic with youngsters.