Wreckage and Ruin – those are the newest nicknames for the two youngest boys. Which one is which depends on the day.
Things that survived all previous eight children without nary a scratch are now being systematically destroyed. I like that they are good buddies and all but please, oh, please why do they feed off of the other’s naughtiness?
It is not enough to unroll the toilet paper, nor put it all in the toilet. Oh no! It must then be placed, with glee I might add, on one another’s heads and then trailed down the hallway in a sticky mass. If one (or three) scoops of Nesquik are enough for a good cup of chocolate milk, than surely half the container will be even better! Eating multicolored goldfish crackers is much more fun when you let them go swimming in a bowl of water first. And then after you eat a few too many it is even more fun to regurgitate them on the new area rug and use it as finger paint.
Who me? I didn’t do anything!
Aw, c’mon, Mom. You know I wouldn’t do anything like that.
Why can’t they be like their older brother who makes me delicious chocolate chip cookies?
Oh, that’s right then it would require they give up the cubes of butter they were caught eating by the handful just because.
After having so many girls I am now having to navigate the waters of having two boys in a row. This is how I know that evolution is wrong. Mothers would have eight arms by now or the ability to be ElastiGirl to keep up with their kids! And while it is very trying some days to have these two rascals I actually quite enjoy laughing at what they come up with next. They are some pretty smart whippersnappers! The hugs and kisses they give and devotion when they only want Mom also melts my heart. I love my children to pieces! For now I will try to figure out how I can best redirect their, um, creative labors into something worthwhile and productive as they get older.
Any tips from mamas of boys or very rambunctious children?
Honestly? Just endure. You take it one day at a time. I was also surprised at how rambunctious and destructive my boys were after my first two girls. Now, after having four boys in a row, I’ve learned that my boys are simply boys. Yes, I can teach them proper behavior (still do) and yes, they are the sweetest little things alive (such good hearts!), but the truth is they are curious little beings and part of their discovery is simply to test out how everything works (or doesn’t work!). And I just deal with it as it comes.
They are SO curious. That’s what causes a lot of difficulties. Ganache tried sticking seven different knives into the toaster because he realized each one gave a different “zap” of electricity depending on the alloy make-up of the metal in the knife.
I remember a story Tanya Gibson told of being downstairs cleaning, then coming up to find one of her boys and the entire kitchen covered in peanut butter and oats! All she could do was laugh! Things could be worse. One or both could be a little slow, like someone I know, and take years to get out of the habit of always having a stick (sword) in his hand and whacking the heads off every flower, destroying every bush, scratching numerous vehicles, or paint jobs on anything, or finding a can of spray paint to joyously spray dots all over grandma’s freezer, or another time finding some scissors and cutting the sleeves off everything hung low enough in the closet, then going after the brand new comforter! Remember to BEWARE THE QUIET!!!!
Oh, I remember you telling that story about Delaney cutting the sleeves in Relief Society one day! Ganache has recently discovered scissors and utility knives. While Mr. Ferrero Rocher was working on installing the flooring in the addition he left to go to the church. I found Ganache shredding the padding that goes underneath the flooring with a utility knife.
In the last 2 weeks my three year-old darling little GIRL has emptied an entire bottle of grown-up body wash into the bathtub, two bottles of Elmer’s glue (one on the floor of her bed room, at least the other was on a table) and a half of bottle of shea-butter lotion on her head. I’ve only got 4 (6, 6, 3, and 18 months). All by herself she has more destruction power than my twin boys did put together. For me, I think it’s my fault — I don’t pay as much attention as I should. I’ve got more little bodies needing attention — and the littlest IS demanding, more laundry, more dishes, more everything. Redirection, humor and prayer, those are what get me through!
Humor has been my main go-to. Laughing is so much better than yelling! Thanks for your advice!
I have five boys so I know exactly what you’re talking about! Many times it is literally one day at a time. Sometimes a few minutes at a time too! But boys are so much fun! I have found that I put my most precious things away while they’re little. I kept the bathroom door shut as much as possible (until they can open the door.). I limit the number of things they can get to (we have a locked toy closet that I can rotate toys easily but not have EVERYTHING out and on the floor all the time.). But as you know with any child, it takes a lot of redirection when they’re little! I honestly don’t know what I would even do with a girl now! Enjoy the journey with your curious little boys!
Yes, to the bathroom being shut! I think we need to install a lock at the top. They love to go in there together and get into my make-up. They don’t apply it to themselves but to all the walls and toilet and cabinets instead.
I can totally relate to this! I have 5 boys ages 12 down to 22 months and they do get into everything, not to mention the insane amount of food they can consume. A few years ago we installed locks on everything: the pantry, the refrigerator, the freezer, their older sisters room, our room, the laundry room, the storage room. At first I was very diligent about keeping things locked up just to TRY to stay ahead of them, but now that they are getting older and some of them help more with chores and laundry some of the locks have been removed, and most others are only used on those days when no one seems to want to follow the rules and listen. It certainly hasn’t been a cure all, but it has helped me stay somewhat sane. You have the right idea though, take a lot of pictures so you can enjoy and laugh at those moments later, because there will be a day when you will miss them, or so I’ve been told.
I think locks are going to be needed on a few things around here too! Thanks for sharing what has worked to eleviate some of the trouble.
Ooh! I have experience! I have 3 boys (5,3,1) They are all so different, but #2 is the most likely to destroy things. In all honesty, though, he doesn’t consider himself destructive. He’s just seeing how he can affect/influence/control things around him. A few things that have been helpful to us: 1. A room where they can play and where there is nothing they can destroy/if it’s there, I don’t care if it’s destroyed. We have one room with an indoor trampoline (about 6 feet wide, 18 inches off the floor), a slide, a tunnel, and a play table. But, my #2 boy found a pair of those really dull kid scissors and cut 35 holes in the netting around the trampoline. After a week, I sewed them together and let him get on again. I went upstairs for a minute, and when I got back, he found a new pair of scissors and cut 17 more holes. We just took down the net. Later, he got Elmer’s glue from a closet and dumped it in a big circle all around the carpet, trampoline, walls, clothes, etc. It hasn’t come out of the carpet despite cleaning. 2. Get rid of all permanent markers. They will find them, even if you can’t remember where they are. Trust me. It’s easier to do without them than to replace clothes, repaint walls and ceilings, replace window blinds and ceiling fans, etc! (True story. Thought he was asleep. 18 months later, we’re still find red marks.) Maybe you could do some kind of buddy system and pair an older child with the younger ones so they’re never alone. 3. Don’t borrow things that will be difficult to repair/replace
Hmm, I have to go, but hope that’s helpful!
This was very helpful! Thanks Michelle. We have tried to get rid of all our markers but for some reason Junior Mint is still finding them! He doesn’t draw on the walls or furniture, Instead he likes to bite the tips off and suck on them making for some bright colored teeth and mouth – sometimes blue or green, sometimes orange or red. And also a lot of stained shirts from colored drool.
Call me when they’ve opened the valves on all the extra propane tanks…just because! As for advice? Keep that sense of humor and suppress the screamy yelly mama. I use chocolate and donuts as coping mechanisms, too!
Oi, I’d like to hear that story sometime! Thankfully we don’t have propane tanks, except for on the BBQ grill. Chocolate has so many wonderful uses! 🙂
This post just makes me giggle like crazy! There really IS an innate, God-given difference in the genders. I have two girls (1st and 3rd child) and 6 boys so far (2nd child and then 5 little boys in a row). Really, there are no tips beyond keep your sense of humor and hide the knives. 😉 My boys right now are 10, 7, 5, 3, 2, 1. The girls are 13 and 8. I love seeing the friendships develop but when they are young it always means double trouble!
My father-in-law says “One boy is a boy. Two boys is half a boy. Three boys is no boy at all.” because of the all trouble they get in when they are together. I’m hoping when we move in to our new kitchen I can put the knives up in a locked cupboard. The latest escapade was Ganache using the butcher knives as swords and it was so hard to get them away for fear of being sliced open!
Legos….in all sizes….start with duplo and work your way up…..My boys can build for hours, combine them with wooden trains and you might even get something done!!!! Enjoy it because all too soon they will be leaving for their missions, coming home from their missions and making more messes:) and eating you out of house and home. Sorry started writing about my boys there for a minute (21, 14, 10) For what it is worth Legos really do help them focus all that energy, my returned missionary still builds with the youngers as does their Dad upon occasion. BTW those are handsome little guys!
Yes, legos and trains have helped immensely! I need to figure out how to rotate them or something so they get excited to play with them.
Eat chocolate.
BRILLIANT!!! 😀
I have two groups of 3 boys together. I think that’s because Heavenly Father knew I’d lose my mind if I had 4 together.
My best advice: buckle up and hang on til the ride is done. My oldest boys are now 25, 22 and 20. They are very nice men and they have *almost* grown out of destroying things!
I hear stories of my husband and his brothers (he’s a part of a group of three) when they were growing up and am awed that my mother-in-law is still sane!
As the mother of all boys, it’s the two in a row thing that is your problem. Mine totally are sweet by themselves, but feed off each other’s energy. My advice: Run them until they drop. Seriously. When my people get out of control I send them out to do laps or assign them jumping jacks until they’ve burned off some of that energy. It sounds like a punishment, but they never complain and participate enthusiastically. Everyone is happier afterwards. Have that sweet big boy chase them around the yard. They will love it. Boys just need lots of physical activity.
That is a terrific idea! They love to race. I don’t know why I didn’t think to have them run around outside to burn off some steam. Thank you!
Oh, I laughed silly with this post:) The comments are just as funny and so true.
As for advice or suggestions. Chocolate works for the mom, only adds energy to the boys. Mommy time outs are great. We assign an older child to the little darlings for set periods of time, it helps mom catch her breath:) Be aware of the quiet, their not likely sleeping. I like to have my boys work with me so I know where they are and what they are doing. Enjoy them for as much damage they have done and will do to the toys, walls, furniture, house and whatever else they creatively get into they also bring a lot of love and laughter.
Our Bishop told a story in Sacrament how he and his two brothers accidentally burnt the house down while messing with the hot water heater. Good news, they lived to tell about it, he became a Bishop, one brother is a police officer and the other one works for the Church managing a ranch. Ahhh….hope:)
They burned the house down?!!! Oh their poor mother.
That’s what gets me. I am totally enjoying their mischievous antics but it is wearing me down. Mommy time-outs sound like a grand idea.
So, no good advice, but I do have to say that I laughed and felt relieved that my kiddos aren’t the only ones who eat sticks of butter just for fun. My littlest boy actually screams like he’s being murdered if he sees someone putting butter on things and they don’t cut him off a piece! Laughing and chocolate (for you) are probably the best solutions for now.
Isn’t it crazy how they eat the butter straight? I like butter but not like that!
My advice- don’t ever let them out of your sight without someone else supervising them. Sounds ridiculous, but I know that if I ever let my 22 mo. old boy out of my sight he’s doing something naughty. EVERY TIME. I finally realized I have to keep him in my line of sight at all times until he grows out of this stage.
The only times I let him out of my sight are when he’s in bed (he can’t get out yet), or out in the backyard with his siblings. I happen to have a yard that’s pretty safe and he doesn’t seem to do anything too harmful out there.
Another idea is to buy a play yard- you know the ones that have little “walls” that can fold up, but they open up into a big circle? Grab a box of blocks and stick them in there for 20-30 min. to play while you help someone else with school work or something. I’ve seen another mom with 9 kids have great success with that idea. Do it at a set time when you are really busy and distracted so they are safely occupied during that time.
Think of when the busiest/ most distracted times of your day are and think about what they are doing then. Maybe make a plan for them to be in the play yard, buckled in a high chair, etc.
The ONLY things my baby wants to pay with are 1. My pressure cooker 2, My Bosch mixer 3. My K-Tec blender. If I try to sit down and play with him that is ALL he wants to do. Siiiiiigh.
For me the question is- how do I get anything else done when I have to keep him in my line of sight all day? So far I know that he likes to “help” do whatever I’m doing- laundry, fixing dinner, setting the table, pulling weeds, etc. I just find something he can sort of “help” with and make him a part of it.
Recently he dumped an entire bottle of hand soap on the carpet and I gave up with trying to get the bubbles out after a few hours and every single towel in my house being soaked. Then he went and dumped out a salt grinder all over the kitchen floor. While I cleaned that up he went in the kitchen and started taking all the dishes out of the dish drainer and playing with them, dropping them on the floor, etc. Especially that pressure cooker!
Good luck with those boys!
Thanks, Holly! It was easier in the summer when they were outside a whole lot more. There was a LOT of room for them to roam. I think most damage is done while we are busy with school and while I am at the computer (BUSTED!).
🙂 I can empathize. I have 6 girls and one toddler boy . . . and another boy on the way. I feel as if I am a brand new mom all over again–I haven’t the faintest idea what I’m doing, and he is ever and always full of surprises. 🙂
Wishing you the joy I know you feel in your darling ones.
Oh Anne, congratulations on another little one! I hope all is going well during the pregnancy. And good luck with those two boys. 🙂
My only advice is to HANG IN THERE!!!! Mine are 13 and 11 and the sweetest little ones around. I definitely had my days though. Years actually. They will be each other’s best of friends when they get older and you will realize that you are glad you didn’t send them away!
Oh goodness. This sounds so familiar! And I don’t have any advice, except that I have come to appreciate how much boys add to the family. I had three boys first . . . then three girls . . . and they are different, but I am SO GLAD the little girls have strong, protective older brothers to make them feel safe and loved. I had three older brothers and always felt I was the luckiest girl in the world. And I’m also so happy for the things we as a family would have never gotten interested in without the boys: circuits, engineering, building things, taking things apart. They’re things I had NO interest in as a child, but exploring them now with my boys has been fun and empowering for ME! Even though many of their “science experiments” are things like “how many knives can I stick in this toaster” (your story made me laugh!)—I just love to marvel at their little minds at work. So I TRY, when I’m frustrated, to remember how much less interesting and exciting our family would be without those boy whirlwinds in it. 🙂
Wow, lots of great comments already! I was just going to recommend lots and lots of outdoor time. That’s what really saved me when my boys were little. It still works wonders, now that they’re big! 🙂 Even if it’s yucky weather, I would dress them for it and send them on out!
This makes me feel so much better. I have four boys (7, 5, 3, 9 mos.) and I thought I was just a really bad mom or something because yes, they never stop getting into things, ruining things, making messes, and pushing boundaries. Oh, and three year olds are the worst little troublemakers, which is usually right about when I’ve got a new baby or am pregnant, so yeah. Still, I love boys, They seem so much more straightforward, you know what I mean? Not so much drama, they’re very forgiving and easy to distract or redirect. Of course I don’t really know any different, I’ve had some nieces that scare me to death with their drama and moodiness though. I also don’t know how I’d get along with a prissy little miss when I’m such a tomboy myself,
The only advice I’d give is to give them opportunities to be curious and messy within set bounds., We have specific “mud clothes” for them to dig holes to China in, We have a box of odds and ends from locks with keys, hammers and screwdrivers, to old phones and alarm clocks to take apart –the theory being that they’ll use up some of their curiosity on things that came from the thrift store and not my computer.
I’ve also heard to be their first love. Help them to develop feelings of chivalry by allowing them to help with big, heavy, things and protect you (my kids love killing spiders for me–which ironically my husband won’t) but remind them that they are made tougher to protect girls and people smaller than them (including younger siblings), never to hurt them. I have all boys, but we have baby dolls and a play kitchen in our house to teach them gentleness along with some life skills, and that the home is the most important place even for a Dad. (We won’t mention that sometimes those baby dolls are the villains in their imaginary play, and that the play kitchen is used more often for a hiding place than for pretend cooking, but whatever). As they’ve gotten older I’ve also learned to let go and judge whether or not I should intervene when they are doing something dangerous by asking myself whether they are more likely to break their arm or their neck. If it’s just an arm then it’s probably okay. Arms mend and important lessons will be learned before they become stupid teenagers who think they are invincible.
I have four boys, and two girls. I had three boys first, and then my daughter (who by far has been holding her own with all the boys), another boy, and I just had a girl.
I had to learn to laugh instead of cry.
I taught myself to take a step back and observe (unless it was too dangerous), and figure out what they were learning (because sometimes I could find another cleaner way to teach them the same things).
I made choices between just getting cheap stuff that didn’t matter, and buying stuff that could hold up.
I gave them lots of hugs and kisses.
I picked a few rules that mattered, and was consistent with them.
Oh, and make them help clean up their messes.
My oldest two boys are 15 and 14 now. They are awesome. They still make messes (hello contraband food in their bedroom!), but they also clean it up now too. They are both thoughtful and helpful. I love them a ton (along with all my other boys, tomboy, and baby girl).