When we were engaged Joseph and I wrote many letters to each other. That’s what you did when you lived across the country from one another before cell phones. In one of the letters Joseph wrote he sent a copy of an article with this quote highlighted in blue brackets. Next to it he wrote, “This I long for.”
“Create a home where a young man looks to his wife as his equal, his comfort, his dearest friend, and his greatest asset; where a young woman walks beside her husband, neither before nor behind him, as a companion and looks to him as the light and strength of her life; where children feel secure in the embrace and love of happy parents, who nurture and teach and instill in them those moral and ethical standards which will guide them throughout their lives.” Gordon B. Hinckley
We have tried, the two of us, to create just such a home. We are each other’s best friend. We try to put each other before ourselves, serving one another and working together to teach our children. Oh, we have definitely made mistakes! But I am certain our successes outnumber our mistakes mainly because we have brought God into the equation and let Him direct our lives.
When we put God first, all other things fall into their proper place or drop out of our lives. Our love of the Lord will govern the claims for our affection, the demands on our time, the interests we pursue, and the order of our priorities.
We should put God ahead of everyone else in our lives.
The Lord said, “He that loveth father or mother more than me is not worthy of me: and he that loveth son or daughter more than me is not worthy of me” (Matt. 10:37). ~Ezra Taft Benson, “The Great Commandment—Love the Lord,” ~
By putting the Lord first we have seen everything else fall into place. We have been carried through our trials and blessed beyond measure. We also believe what God has declared about marriage cannot be changed. A statement put out by my church says in part,
“Marriage is sacred and was ordained of God from before the foundation of the world. Jesus Christ affirmed the divine origins of marriage: “Have ye not read, that he which made them at the beginning made them male and female, and said, For this cause shall a man leave father and mother, and shall cleave to his wife: and they twain shall be one flesh?” (Matthew 19:4–5)
“From the beginning, the sacred nature of marriage was closely linked to the power of procreation. After creating Adam and Eve, God commanded them to “be fruitful, and multiply, and replenish the earth,” and they brought forth children, forming the first family. Only a man and a woman together have the natural biological capacity to conceive children. This power of procreation—to create life and bring God’s spirit children into the world—is divinely given. Misuse of this power undermines the institution of the family.” 1
Man and woman are made to complement and complete one another. God has made it so! No amount of scientific finagling has yet to find a way to create a human being without a male or a female. There must be both to create a child, and thus perpetuate the human race. Marriage between a man and a woman was created as the ideal for children to come into this world. It is sad and tragic that American society has degenerated so far that for many marriage is no longer considered a sacred institution.
Sad and tragic the very definition of marriage has gone from this entry in the 1828 Noah Webster’s Dictionary where God, prevention of promiscuous behavior, happiness and children are mentioned:
MAR’RIAGE, n. [L.mas, maris.] The act of uniting a man and woman for life; wedlock; the legal union of a man and woman for life. Marriage is a contract both civil and religious, by which the parties engage to live together in mutual affection and fidelity, till death shall separate them. Marriage was instituted by God himself for the purpose of preventing the promiscuous intercourse of the sexes, for promoting domestic felicity,and for securing the maintenance and education of children.
Marriage is honorable in all and the bed undefiled. Heb.13.
1. A feast made on the occasion of a marriage.
The kingdom of heaven is like a certain king, who made a marriage for his son. Matt.22.
2. In a scriptural sense, the union between Christ and his church by the covenant of grace. Rev.19.
to this “modernized” definition where God is taken out of the equation, children aren’t important, and the very basis of man and wife – one man, one woman – is changed to same gender partners :
mar·riage
noun1. a.the social institution under which a man and woman establish their decision to live as husband and wife by legal commitments, religious ceremonies, etc.
b. a similar institution involving partners of the same gender: gay marriage.
2. the state, condition, or relationship of being married; wedlock: a happy marriage.
3. the legal or religious ceremony that formalizes the decision of two people to live as a married couple, including the accompanying social festivities: to officiate at a marriage.
4. a relationship in which two people have pledged themselves to each other in the manner of a husband and wife, without legal sanction: trial marriage.
People want to make their choices without suffering the consequences. But consequences always come, sooner or later, and often it is not just the person who made the choice that is affected but those around them and future generations.
The need to defend traditional marriage has never been greater. In “The Family: A Proclamation to the World,” an inspired document first read in 1995, the First Presidency and Quorum of the Twelve Apostles proclaim that “marriage between a man and a woman is ordained of God and that the family is central to the Creator’s plan for the eternal destiny of His children.”
I believe that! I live it. My husband and I teach it to our children. And we try to defend the sanctity of marriage and family whenever we can. As a mother I am also thankful for my constitutionally protected right to practice my religion, to teach my children God’s morals no matter what the philosophies of man may say, and to stand firm in my beliefs.
“No matter how the wind may howl, the mountain cannot bow to it.” – Emperor, Mulan
Part of those beliefs are to love everyone, yes! And we do! But loving does not mean condoning that which is morally wrong. Even when man changes law to suit their fancy or whims if it is against God’s law it is still immoral even though it may be ‘legal.’ Abortion is one such law that comes to mind.
After reading The Family Proclamation President Gordon B. Hinckley said, “The strength of any nation is rooted within the walls of its homes. We urge our people everywhere to strengthen their families in conformity with these time-honored values.”
Ever wonder why our economy is in shambles? Because our homes are in shambles. Economy, when reduced to its Greek roots2 means “the principles to maintain our house.” What are those principles? The time-tested values of marriage, family, fidelity, chastity, virtue, love.
I encourage everyone to read the proclamation again and again. It truly is an inspired document. Our religion is not the only one who realizes that traditional marriage and family, and the roles wives and husbands have in those relationships is under attack. We can work together, in fact have worked together – to defend marriage and family. In an historic gathering hosted by the Catholic Church religious leaders and scholars representing 14 faith traditions from 23 countries assembled at the Vatican to discuss how men and women complement each other in marriage. From that gathering the Humanum website was created to share the common beliefs of marriage between a man and a woman. This video3 is the first in a series discussing the complementarity of men and women.
Episode 1: The Destiny of Humanity from Humanum on Vimeo.
The last paragraph of the Family Proclamation reads “We call upon responsible citizens and officers of government everywhere to promote those measures designed to maintain and strengthen the family as the fundamental unit of society.” I encourage you, wherever you are, whatever nation you live in, whatever your religion may be to defend traditional marriage, defend family. Strengthen your own marriage and family today and every day. We can make a difference in our own spheres of influence!
1. The Divine Institution of Marriage
2. eco – oikos – family organization or the house; nomy – nomos – act, law, or principle
3. Humanum – The Destiny of Humanity: On the Meaning of Marriage; all four videos are beautiful!
This post is part of a blog hop with these fabulous bloggers! We’re talking about our marriages, giving tips, and sharing what we’ve learned but most importantly we’re defending traditional marriage between a man and a woman.
Mandy @ A Bliss Complete |Hilary @ Pulling Curls |Emily @ Celestial Shine Magazine | Kerry @ My Random Sampler
Jocelyn @ We Talk of Christ | Jenifer @ Moss Moments | Montserrat @ Cranial Hiccups
Jennifer @ My Daylights | Camille @ Chicken Scratch ‘n’ Sniff | Angela @ Mormon Women Stand | Kathryn @ Well Behaved Mormon Woman
jocelyn christensen says
The inclusion of the two dictionary definitions of marriage in this post is powerful. We can turn our backs on the doctrine of the family, only at our own risk. And you’re right, the mountain cannot bow down to the wind, but we can continue to be benevolent in light of the decisions of others. When all is said and done on this earth, the family as God has instituted it is all that will remain. What we want is for all to be able to enjoy having a family for eternity if it is what they choose! Great post, Montserrat!
Montserrat {Cranial Hiccups} says
Reading through definitions in the 1828 Noah Webster’s dictionary can be very eye opening for a whole lot of other words too. Our society changes the meaning of words so much!
Kendra says
Love this post! Thanks for sharing your thoughts with the world!!
Camille says
Love this post and the definitions you included. I especially the love the quote from Mulan though and the pictures of you and your husband. Thanks for being such a great defender of the family.
Montserrat {Cranial Hiccups} says
The Mulan quote is because my 3 year old has been watching it constantly for the last couple of weeks. 😀 I couldn’t get it out of my head!
Angela says
Beautiful post! Couldn’t have said it better myself. Bravo for sharing this important message with the world!
Emily says
Thank you. This is becoming an even hotter topic in some areas. I appreciate especially the two dictionary definitions. My how our world has changed. Thank you for standing for traditional marriage. Emily
Montserrat {Cranial Hiccups} says
Thank you Emily!
Kerry says
Montserrat, You are spot on! Our world has come so far that there’s an entire generation or two that have not been taught the original, correct definition of marriage. You share your beliefs clearly without sounding preachy. Well done.
Montserrat {Cranial Hiccups} says
Thank you, Kerry. It is amazing how the definition of words can change over time and sometimes drastically!
Camie says
Thank you for this beautiful post and for standing for truth and light.
Kevin says
I loved reading this!! I would just omit the traditional part and just say defend marriage. Marriage is still what it always has been, even when counterfeits are pawned on us.